Saturday, February 11, 2012

Dear Bob,

Because I promised you a happy post and one that I hope you'd comprehend better than most, here goes...

April is exactly two months away. Two months is a long long time. And knowing you, you'd probably fall in and out of love with me over 800 times in the course of these two months. But two months it is. Unless of course you stop being such a miser and take an earlier flight back. 
Or worse, you decide to not come back at all.
But that's another story.

But this isn't so much about your coming back (Weeeeee:D) as it is about me missing you. And of course, I keep telling you that over and over and then another time after that. But that's just because of my irrational fear of you getting over me. It probably goes back to the time when you'd crumble my tiny little 18 year old heart into pieces of ash on a regular basis. 
Oh! Has it been that long?
Apparently.
A questionably large mix of Chivas and Teachers later, i get down to write this. Because I told you I would yesterday. Yesterday; when I forbade you to hate me. And you said I can't. Like, you forbade me to forbid you. It's pretty damn funny if I think of it now. 
It wasn't last night.

But I'm not buzzed just yet. And what a shame that is. But it's this alcohol, in inappropriate amounts no less, that gets me closest to any forms of happiness I've known in recent times. And then there's you. 
You, who I just can't figure out.

But I mkiss you.
I remember you. The way you  cocked your little head to one side and did that thing you do with your fingers(knuckles?) to my head. So affectionate! So originalllll!!
And then of course, I saw you do it to someone else too. But that hardly mattered. You did it to me too. And that was enough, I thought.
Not really. Not enough. But it made me happy.
And then began days and nights of my stalking you. Mentally more.
I would 'plan' for hours together and think of how I would jaaaasstt pounce on you and probably bite your elbow off. Or your cheeks? Either/or really. Or grab you and hug you for one eternity too many. Ooo ooo.. and when we saw that Padukone draaaaaggg of a movie with your fingers in my mouth. That wasn't planned. I was just really really bored.

Too much is coming back to me now.
And I cannot believe it can be this harsd to just switch and be gay for life. Because, I want to spend my entire life with youuuuuuu. It will be magical. 

But that's hardly important. What is important is that you're getting back. And I demand of and command you to take me out like old times. Eat crappy pizzas with me and make yours better by ketchup-ing the fuck out of it. And then talk in your car and talk for 34567876 hours as my neighbourhood judges us girls smoking. 
Oh! And I think ive told you about how Ive wanted to kiss you too? Just the one time though.
But what do you know?? I have a fair share of girl stories to tell you when you come back this time. hahaha.


And it just struck me that the magic isn't that important as of n ow,I guess.
We can just laugh for now instead.



Love and Lust,
Yours truly,
Me :)



From Drafts

I sometimes miss being in unrequited love to text them to overthink their text to romanticize every moment to actually dream about them...