Friday, February 25, 2011

Yawning Mornings

There comes a point in each individual's life when he's faced with the reality of being a loser. My point has arrived. No, seriously! What is up with my generation of the world who suddenly knows it all in terms of what they want in life? And here I am, part of the very same generation, as clueless as clueless gets. College gets over in another year and then what? Exactly. No Idea.
The fact that I'm suffering from a very very very bad cold right now isn't particularly helping things.

So I don't know jack shit about any of my current books, I have no cool internship on my CV, no real job experience to boast about and no motivation for any of this. For the most part of my life, I have pictured myself very rich. Filthy rich, is more like it. But now, by the look of things, I would be fortunate if I am able to get together a meal a day without complete failure. Yes, things are that scattered. I am barely twenty years old and to feel/think like this isn't my favourite activity to do.

Speaking of activities, I'm getting back (started) to.. *drum-roll*... writing my book. Yes, it's happened! Yes, I would like more attention/ drama surrounding the announcement. But who am I kidding? It's just a damn blog that no one reads and knowing me, I'm going to get over the idea of writing ze book sooner than I start it. Yes, I have attention issues, like that. So no one cares, which is good. 'Expectations' is just as scary a word as 'Forever'. My point being, that more than who-does-what and who-gets-what, the alarming concern should be that who-wants-what because let's face it there are so many of us and all of us want the exact same thing and that's just so mother fucking depressing! Obviously it is that who is not excellent who is going to lose ground the soonest. Being average is a bitch!

Cell phones and Facebook are annoying me . It makes me want to throw up a little in my mouth when I look back only to see these to as being one of the major reasons for my existence.

Ooo.. So you have love-hate-sex relationship, you have spent hours dressing up just right for him but also pretending like you put on the first thing you saw, you have avoided him, 'apparently' bumped into him. wrote about him, sneaked out with him, partied with him... and so much more. So fucking much more! You know just as much as he does that you are not exclusive anymore. 
But is it completely unreasonable for you to think it's weird when he comes and cries over his 'girlfriend' to you and expects a shoulder to cry on couched in beautiful sounding advice?
I don't know. I think it's weird.

Also, Im serious about being an alcoholic. 


  1. I like your writing is satirical, cynical, and yet to the point.....its is simple and straightforward...
    I could relate to this one alot.
    You see being an straight a student in school, i knew almost everything, meant to be known till my 18 its been two years since i stepped out into the real world....and i had recently across this point in my life of making opinions on political issues and current events(which i don't if is with every teen but it sure was with me) i am trying to think if i believe in god, or do i totally reject the i a capitalist or a communist or an anarchist.....should one be in a relationship, or stay it ethical to have no strings attatched kind of fun....yada-yada.....i still havent been able to make my mind about it as yet...but anyways....i plan to point is why do we have to be so judgmental about life....and why do we have to know...anyways nice post.

  2. I want to be filthy rich too. Don't know how that would possibly happen.
    But somewhere amongst all the mess of what I really want to be, being rich always remains.

    And do work on that book of yours. I'd be glad to read.

    Get well soon.

  3. Oh, what's the book going to be about? I once wrote a chic-lit when I was in was so horrible, I almost wanted to puke in my own mouth. :D. It was fun writing it though. I'm sure you'd be better than me. Please finish it.

  4. @Kshipra- If a straight A student is facing trouble finding ground, there really is very little hope for us low mortals. Judgmental or not, I thought cynicism helps sail through. And then reality hit me.. epic fail! Thank you for ze appreciation. I feel cool.

    @Ananya- But what if richness doesn't happen for sure, you know?
    Awww.. and you care about my book :) Also, why don't you write as much as I would like you to?

    @Missy- I don't know what/how it's going to be. There's a long long way for that! :)

  5. I don't know then. Everything would be so pointless. :/
    And yes, I do care about your book :D
    And yeah, would try writing more frequently.

  6. I always imagine i'm the protagonist of the *movie*,so in the end i'd end up alive AND very rich.
    Now im starting to worry a little,after my first semester exams >.>

    Post a couple of chapters online when you're done with that much,i'd love to read it! =D

  7. Ah! The ever so awesome movie dream. I have been the superstar almost always. Exams are quite the ani-feel, yes.

    I like you getting encouraging about the book that may never see the light of the day. Shall make you read :)

  8. You sound so much like me it's uncanny.
    No wait. I sound so much like a whinier, sad-der version of you. I want to be you, yeh hear?

    *do i sound creepy enough*

    I like you. I like your blog. And I will read it, even if no one else does =)
    See! I read so much that I got to such a old post :P

  9. Youuuuu! :)
    You're far from creepy.